Heteronormative housing

When I purchased my first home at 19, in 2002, I didn’t know any other gay men who owned a property in Halifax, period. I figured I have entered a heteronormative area. 15 years later, on the other side of the fence as a broker, that number is immeasurable.

Which is heartening.

Homeownership is a milestone for everyone and a stressful time for most. For LGBTQ* people, it’s also a potential gauntlet with a thin veil of discrimination and institutionalized barriers.

But I’m getting ahead of myself.

You live in a heteronormative home, on a heteronormative street, in a heteronormative world.

Unfortunately, (for them) so do your gay neighbours.

Heteronormativity is the belief that heterosexuality is the normal, default state of human sexuality. A heteronormative society operates on the assumption that heterosexuality is inherent, reducing the existence and experiences of LGBTQ* people to outliers.

You might even say it perpetuates a cultural bias favouring heterosexual relationships by default, which is reflected in systemic barriers faced by LGBTQ* folks.

(Note: This. Is. Why. We. Still. Need. Pride.)

Examples of heteronormativity:

• School trip forms with signature spaces for ‘mom’ and ‘dad’ instead of ‘parent/guardian’
• A man and woman holding hands, or otherwise expressing affection, without fear
• Not having to ‘come out’ as a heterosexual ( at all, let alone every day)
• Health classes in school that only cover matters of cisgender straight people

When it comes specifically to homeownership and housing, heteronormativity rears its ugly head in a variety of ways. Systemic discrimination, like landlords ignoring applications from people that are clearly not cis-gendered and straight. Seniors unable to find retirement facilities that openly welcome LGBTQ* people without prejudice.

On a personal level, heteronormativity shows itself in different ways. An inability to anticipate the potential concerns of an LGBTQ* client, like neighbourhood safety, crime rates, and the general political climate. An embarrassed smirk accompanied by inquiries into the exact nature of the relationship of the applicants: “So are you friends, or…..?”.

Perhaps least offensive, but still worthy of mention, are the concept of ‘His and Hers’ sinks or walk-in closets. Heteronormative and tacky, two birds with one stone.

With love, Clinton

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